How

How can I help and support others when I barely can lift myself up? 
Everything I say is just a complaint to most people. 
I’m exhausted. No longer knowing to trust myself.  Not knowing what else to do.  Or is it not wanting to move?
I’m screaming for help,  but what is heard only anger and the scream.  Maybe I shouldn’t be this way.  I’m much fortunate than others out there.  More fortunate than those who live near the rail tracks or under the bridge.  Am I?  Looking at living conditions,  I am.  I must not be hopeless and helpless like this.  Yet..  I still find it hard to move.  A choice?  Yes it is. 
I don’t understand why am I so comfortable at this place.  Not wanting to move.  Not even wanting to choose the one I know will lift me up.  I really don’t.

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