2014 is almost coming to an end. Looking back, this year has been like a circle. Going round and around to the same breakdowns, ironically. Yet, I’ve done new things. Small steps towards patience, towards a shift. For some it may be a small shift. For me, it was and still is a struggle. Breaking old habits. Building new ones wasn’t easy. It was and still is painful. Tears, sweat and blood also were involved (dramatic effect). But for me, that’s how it felt and still is.
Learning to not think too much. To just breathe. To just feel and accept myself especially. I’m perfect in my imperfections, why do I need to compare and say otherwise? Everyone is beautiful in their own way. So am I. This sounds familiar doesn’t it? This is the attitude where I need to keep, constantly. Stand on my feet. Stand ground. Doesn’t mean being stubborn or righteous. But loving myself enough so no one or nothing can bring me down. Even if they do, I can always bounce back.
Why not love me? Behind my hard and stubborn exterior, I have a heart that just loves. That see the beauty, the good and the wonder in others. Why not see it in myself? You may say I’m weak, naif or stupid. It’s going to be OK.
This is who I am, who has never failed me. The core. My magic.
Remember it (talking to self)