Precious to me

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Well…  Fear is what gets me the most.  Stupid pride,  not really.  I’m more kinda stupid minus the pride.  Correction,  not stupid but naive, or is it a dreamer?  Any other way…  I fear the future too much and can’t seem to let go of the past.  Too much of both makes me fail to live in the present moment.

I pick certain moments in the present to live in,  if you know what I mean. Most of the time,  my mind and my heart wanders to a place 3 –  4 hours from where I’m at. Of course that causes unnecessary ageing,  hahaha.  Add some wrinkles or panda eyes because of the lack of sleep.  I mean,  of course age matters to me now.  I’m turning 35 this year. Gosh..  Apparently,  I haven’t matured at all -_-. 

Awareness doesn’t serve me at all.  What’s the point of awareness if I do nothing about it or do nothing different about it.  Silly.

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