Well… Fear is what gets me the most. Stupid pride, not really. I’m more kinda stupid minus the pride. Correction, not stupid but naive, or is it a dreamer? Any other way… I fear the future too much and can’t seem to let go of the past. Too much of both makes me fail to live in the present moment.
I pick certain moments in the present to live in, if you know what I mean. Most of the time, my mind and my heart wanders to a place 3 – 4 hours from where I’m at. Of course that causes unnecessary ageing, hahaha. Add some wrinkles or panda eyes because of the lack of sleep. I mean, of course age matters to me now. I’m turning 35 this year. Gosh.. Apparently, I haven’t matured at all -_-.
Awareness doesn’t serve me at all. What’s the point of awareness if I do nothing about it or do nothing different about it. Silly.