Of course I’d wake up around this time. The first thought is always the same. The flu doesn’t help either. Makes it even harder to go back to sleep. What is it?  Why can’t I just stop. Choose different thoughts. Why?

I’m sure others who have a similar problem could do it. Change your thoughts, they say. Choose new and different thoughts. Don’t expect too much. Believe without expecting. Hmm.. 

Expectations has broke me.  Even when my expectation is for people to treat me like I treat them. Even that hurts when it doesn’t happen or stops happening. Some people just stop when they discover I expect more. They get afraid. Or doubt. Maybe they’re right. When you have someone like me who expects more from them,  it is scary. I demand more. It sound negative,  huh?  For me…  I guess I’m like that because I believe they could be more than they think they are.  But again,  just because I think that,  doesn’t mean others think that. Or even see it. Not necessarily.

That’s what I need to learn..  Believe without expecting.


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