A scale from 1 to 10

From the scale of 1 to 10, how do you rate your pain? And the image of smiley faces shows up on Baymaxx’ body.  My rate of pain right now…  Is more than 10.

Just one sentence,  has affect my tolerance to pain. Inside,  I’m clutching my stomach and crying out loud.  Screaming so loud that it hurts my chords.

Regret? How can I ever regret my choice? How can I regret the feelings I had and still have?  I’m now faced with consequences of my actions…. The only thing to do is face and feel it all…  I can’t run away even if I wanted to…  I can’t hide the pain and all feelings I have right now under the carpet….  Cannot push it down… 

Time to think of myself…  Time to truly heal myself..  No turning back..  No more hoping..  No more relying…  No more giving myself like this…  No more…  It’s enough….  Enough already….   

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