I’m not

No, I’m not ok
It hurts
I try to smile in front of others
And even myself
Try to convince myself and others I’m ok
But I’m not
I feel like clutching my stomach
Cry my heart out
Scream
I can’t ask why anymore
This pain is a result of my choice
But I need to cry out
Flush this pain little by little
Better if it goes all away
Please
I need to heal
Because I’m worth it
Because I’m precious
Because I need my heart back
Please.. 
I need to this for my sanity
Please, God… 
Help me..

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